Rebecca Gonzales

I Rebecca have been told the following about myself:

You're a great Mom.
You were always better than him.
You're so photogenic.
I don't want to fight you.
You have such thick hair girl.
You have horse teeth.
I don't know what they see in you.
You're not fat!!
DAMN your bangin like a firecracker on the fourth of July!!
You have such a pretty smile.
My Mom thinks you're the weirdest person she's met.
You ARE GHETTO!!
You can't hit...learn to take a hit!! hit HER!!
You are so smart.
NO one's ever going to want to be with you.
I've never met anyone as fake as you.
You can write girl!
You act spoiled, like everyone owes you something.
Mommy you burn everything you cook.
I've never had such crazy drunken fun like hangin out with you.
You are the perfect shade of brown.
Nappy head, your pretty, pretty UGLY!!
What are you staring at BUG EYES!
I like how you're thick.
I never have to worry about you, you take care of yourself.
You are a really cool chick (if I hadn't cheated with your man) I wish we could have been friends.



And I don't believe any of it!!  I see myself as a well rounded person.  I know that I can be annoying for being too outspoken, but at the same time I can have such a dry, bland side where I can't even carry a conversation.  All of the things others believe about me, even down to the physical stuff, I tend to dismiss because I feel like we all see eachother differently.  One person can think I am the most beautiful creature ever encountered (give em my number if you meet em! lol) or be completely disgusted by how I look.  Its all perception....and frankly it doesn't matter.  People will say things to boost you or hurt you just as well, but you have to always keep in mind that behind the words are their intentions.  ONLY THAT.  People are not telling you things for you...its for them.  I have horse teeth because my ex wants to feel like he's thrown me down again.  You have such a pretty smile, is because I'm not interested in what you are saying, you can tell and you feel like you need to compliment me probably because you know I'm a little embarrassed with my horse teeth. lol

I just try to keep my relationships with people less personal.  I don't take anything in anymore.  I was always worried about what others thought, and now I just feel like its not what I look like its what they see.  Its not what I say, it's what they hear.  What I think of myself has to just matter most.